The CrossRoads Collective Podcast

Redefining Love: Marriage as a Path to Spiritual Maturity

JM Season 1 Episode 11

Is marriage really about finding happiness or could it be about something much deeper? Gary Thomas, through his profound insights in "Sacred Marriage," argues that the ultimate purpose of marriage is to cultivate holiness. Join us as we unpack this transformative journey by reflecting on scriptures like Ephesians 5:25-27 and Romans 8:28-29. Explore how marriage can be a spiritual crucible that fosters growth through sacrificial love, patience, and forgiveness. We also dig into practical tips for prioritizing spiritual growth in your marriage, constructively handling conflicts, and practicing the radical forgiveness that transforms relationships. 

Discover the power of prayer in nurturing your marriage and the profound impact of releasing grudges and extending forgiveness, just as Christ forgave us. We discuss the importance of community support, small groups, and marriage classes in providing essential resources and a sense of belonging. Sharing your journey with other couples can offer valuable inspiration and encouragement. We wrap up with a heartfelt prayer, expressing gratitude for the gift of marriage and seeking the virtues of patience, kindness, and a forgiving heart to strengthen our connection with God and each other. Tune in for an enlightening conversation that challenges conventional views on marriage and inspires a deeper, more spiritual approach to your relationship.

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For listeners looking to deepen their engagement with the topics discussed, visit our website or check out our devotionals and poetry on Amazon, with all proceeds supporting The New York School of The Bible at Calvary Baptist Church. Stay connected and enriched on your spiritual path with us!

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Hello, I'm JM, your host. I'm really excited to have you here with me. Whether you're new to the podcast scene or a long-time listener, today's discussion is sure to engage and inspire you. Let's begin our prayer to the Lord. Dear God, we respectfully ask for your wisdom and guidance as we explore the profound teachings of your Word. May our conversation today be a source of inspiration and strengthen our connection with you, my Lord, in Jesus' name.

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Today we're diving deep into a topic that has a profound impact on individuals and society at large marriage. Let's get into the fascinating connection between marriage and spirituality, that Gary Thomas' thought-provoking book Sacred Marriage, which, if you haven't picked this up, I highly recommend you do. And what's about the book? In my opinion, it's written for both married couples and those who are planning to get married. Now let's dive into the concept of sacred marriage, which highlights the belief that marriage is meant to sanctify us rather than just bring us happiness. Gary Thomas poses an intriguing question what if the purpose of marriage is to nurture holiness instead of solely seeking happiness? Initially, this concept might take you by surprise, but it provides a profound understanding of the real essence of marriage.

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Let's kick off our discussion by delving into some crucial scriptures. In Ephesians 5.25.27, paul delves into the topic. Husbands, demonstrate your affection for your wives by emulating the selfless love that Christ displayed for the church. Sacrificing himself for her, he aimed to purify her, using the power of his words to cleanse her. His ultimate goal is to portray the church as a perfect and immaculate entity, free from any flaws. He wants her to be pure and faultless. Paul explores love in a way that goes beyond just talking about it as a feeling. He dives into how it can be applied in practical ways and emphasizes the importance of long-term commitment. He is showing that marriage is a transformative journey, a way to nurture spiritual growth. Reflect on that for a moment. Marriage has the power to ignite our spiritual growth. It's not just about companionship or romance, although those are wonderful aspects. It's about embracing sacrificial love, forgiveness, patience and spiritual growth together.

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Gary Thomas explores the impact of marriage on our self-awareness, revealing our flaws and vulnerabilities. Let's approach this as a chance to trust in God and embrace personal development when faced with challenges. In our marriage, we have an opportunity to learn and evolve as individuals. In Romans 8, 28, 29, paul delves into the topic. And we know that God causes all things to work together for good for those who love God and for those who are called according to his purpose, for those whom he forked new. He also predestined to conform to the image of his son, so that he would be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. This verse is a powerful reminder of how God works in different areas of our lives, including our marriages, to shape us into the image of His Son. Our experiences in marriage, both the challenges and the victories, contribute to our personal growth and development. Now let's explore some practical tips for fully embracing the concept of marriage as a pathway to holiness. What are some practical ways to fully embrace the sacred union of marriage and use it as a pathway to spiritual growth? First and foremost, it's important to shift our point of view. We prioritize spiritual growth over mere personal happiness. It's crucial to prioritize our personal growth in Christlikeness, while still acknowledging and fulfilling our needs and desires.

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The passage from 1 Corinthians 13.4.7 beautifully depicts the essence of love. Love is patient, love is kind and not envious. Love does not boast and is not prideful. Prideful, it behaves appropriately. It does not seek its own interests, it is not easily provoked. It does not keep a record of wrongs, it does not delight in wrongdoing but rejoices in the truth. It supports, believes, hopes and perseveres through all things. This passage is frequently encountered at weddings, but its significance extends far beyond its poetic nature. It offers practical insights that can be applied in real-life situations. It showcases the essence of love through its actions. It's important to cultivate patience and kindness, to release grudges and to always prioritize the well-being of others.

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Navigating through conflicts is a frequent hurdle that many couples face in their marriage. It's not uncommon for minor disagreements to quickly spiral into significant issues. Nevertheless, when we tackle conflict with the aim of personal growth and spiritual development, it profoundly changes our approach. Our aim is to promote understanding and seek common ground, rather than engaging in debate to win, as stated in James 1.19.20,. This, my dear audience. It's crucial for everyone to be attentive listeners, thoughtful speakers and avoid reacting with anger too hastily. This is because human anger fails to align with the righteousness that God desires. Listening is a powerful tool for resolving conflicts. When we truly tune in to our spouse, we show them genuine respect and affection it's essential to grasp their point of view and establish a shared understanding. Affection it's essential to grasp their point of view and establish a shared understanding.

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Forgiveness plays a vital role in every marriage. We all make mistakes, because, well, we're only humans after all. Understanding the detrimental effects of harboring grudges, it becomes evident that forgiveness is crucial for the healing and restoration of a marriage. Colossians 3.13 serves as a gentle reminder. It's important to bear with one another and practice forgiveness. If you have a complaint against someone, remember how the Lord forgave you and strive to do the same. Forgiveness holds great significance in the Gospel. Jesus has demonstrated the incredible strength of forgiveness, and it is our responsibility to extend that same compassion to others, especially our spouse.

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Keeping a strong and sacred marriage can be quite a challenge, but it's an essential aspect of life. Get ready to immerse yourself in the captivating story of Hosea and Gomer from the book of Hosea. Hosea received the divine command to marry Gomer, a woman who would ultimately betray his trust. In spite of her infidelity, hosea felt a deep sense of obligation to love her unconditionally and offer forgiveness. This story eloquently highlights the deep love of God and serves as a powerful reminder of the significance of showing that same grace and forgiveness in our marriages.

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Now let's delve into the fascinating topic of prayer. Coming together in prayer as a couple has the power to bring about profound change, allowing the presence of God to permeate your marriage. It's an excellent method for maintaining a spiritual connection and seeking guidance from God as a collective. Philippians 4, 6, 7 offers a source of encouragement. Don't fret about a thing, but rather communicate your desires to God through prayer and thankfulness. May you find solace in the peace of God, a peace that is beyond understanding as it watches over your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Praying together is a strong reminder of our connection and support. We can take comfort in the belief that there is always a higher power with us, providing guidance and giving us the strength we need. It creates a sense of calm and unity that is crucial for a strong marriage.

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Prayer is a practice that can be both straightforward and deeply meaningful. Start by expressing appreciation for one another, then smoothly transition into offering prayers for each other's needs and concerns. It doesn't have to be long or complicated. What's important is that you're both actively seeking a connection with God. Here are a few useful pointers for praying together. First, make sure to set up a regular schedule that works well for everyone involved. Timing is crucial, whether it's in the morning, before bed or even during a lunch break. Furthermore, it is crucial to approach your prayers with genuine sincerity. Share your joys and struggles with God and with each other in an open and authentic way. Finally, don't allow any initial discomfort to discourage you. Similar to developing any new habit, it takes time to begin feeling comfortable.

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As we near the end of today's episode, I want to provide you with some practical tips. It's important to maintain a level of transparency and sincerity in your communication. Embrace open and honest communication, demonstrating genuine understanding and compassion for each other. Embrace the virtues of patience and kindness, just like someone who hosts a podcast. Remember to always keep in mind that love is patient and kind. It's important that we all approach our interactions with kindness and consideration.

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Release grudges quickly. Try to prevent bitterness from taking hold. Extend forgiveness to others in the same way that Christ extended forgiveness to you. Let's come together in prayer. Make prayer a regular part of your relationship. Join forces and seek guidance and wisdom from a higher power. I suggest reaching out to your church community for support and guidance in finding additional resources and assistance. Engaging in small groups or marriage classes can provide you with valuable resources and a strong sense of community. Remember that there are others on this journey as well. There are others out there who are going through similar experiences and facing similar obstacles. Plenty of couples are on similar journeys and exchanging stories can be truly inspiring.

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Finally, let's conclude today's episode by expressing our gratitude for His wisdom and grace. Dear Lord, we humbly express our gratitude for the incredible gift of marriage that you have bestowed upon us. Help us see it as a sacred journey and strengthen our bond with you by fostering meaningful connections with others. May we receive an abundance of patience, kindness and a heart that is quick to forgive. Give us your wisdom and strengthen our connection as we set out on this shared adventure. In the name of Jesus, amen. I hope today's discussion has left you feeling motivated and given you a lot to think about. Remember that marriage is a lifelong journey and, with God's guidance, we can nurture love and righteousness. As we say goodbye for now, may you be blessed and continue to seek God in all your endeavors.

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